Does the person you just met speak mostly in longer sentences, or shorter sentences? Believe it or not, if you do the same in conversation, it's creates better rapport and he/she is more apt to like you!
Does the person you just met speak mostly in longer sentences, or shorter sentences? Believe it or not, if you do the same in conversation, it's creates better rapport and he/she is more apt to like you!
While meeting someone new, consciously ask yourself, "What can I learn from this person?" And, "What would she enjoy talking about?" It's usually the same thing!
It seems that a virus is spreading all across America and is expanding at an alarming rate. The cause of the disease is not known, but it is highly infectious among the young. One unique aspect of this malady is that it primarily affects those born after 1984. And. for reasons to be revealed here, people over 30 who observe those suffering from it, find it especially nauseating.
It is called the “No Problem Syndrome.” Most tricenarians and above, hearing “No problem” in response to their “Thank-you” IS a problem—and frighteningly ubiquitous. In fact, just this morning at a coffee shop, I asked the server for some sugar. With a big smile, she replied “No problem.” I had to bite my tongue to resist asking her, “Why do YOU think it would be a problem to get me a few sugar packets?” Her saying “no problem” is tantamount to saying “I usually do find it is a problem to get sugar for a customer, but in this one particular case it’s ‘no problem.’”
OK dear young readers, thanks for letting me vent. I know you mean well and are sincerely trying to be gracious. Take heart from this: Soon all of us born before 1984 will be dead and you can say “no problem” to each other for the rest of your lives. In the meantime, please substitute, “You’re welcome.” (And if you really want to impress us, say “It’s my pleasure.”)
Whenever someone gives you good news (that you already knew), don’t tell her you already heard. Just thank her enthusiastically. Good people like giving fiends good news. Let her enjoy it.
I you want someone to do a favor for you, always ask "May I ask you for a favor?" Or start with, "I'd like to ask you for a favor." It's been proven that you're more apt to get it!
You will hear and say “Happy New Year” many times today. It’s a heartfelt and lovely sentiment. Like any phrase heard too many times, however, it loses some of its punch. To make your good wishes more memorable, tweak it a bit. Try a whole sentence, “I hope you have a very happy New Year.” Or something like, “Have a wonderful New Year,” a “beautiful New Year,”or even, “Have an amazing New Year.” Some younger well-wishers will enjoy hearing, “Have an awesome New Year!"
BTW, thanks for reading my tiny tips this past year. I wish all my dear readers a spectacular 2014.
‘Tis the season . . . of holiday parties. And readers have asked for more tips on meeting and mingling.
Tip 1: Planting hidden cameras in the ceiling at parties, researchers proved that people are more apt to approach you if you are not balancing any food in your hands. If you want to hold a drink, keep it below waist level so people don’t see your knuckles which subliminally signal “go away.” Women, a shoulder bag is best to keep your hands free.
Tip 2: Wear something fun and festive that people can comment on. You don't have to don a Santa Claus hat. But things like tiny Christmas ball earrings for women or a reindeer tie for men draws smiling attention.
Tip 3: Isn't it distressing when everyone is chatting amicably and you’re standing all alone? Here's relief. Employ the world’s most obvious but under-used technique: Think of yourself as the Official Party Greeter. Find someone standing alone, extend your hand and say, "Hi, my name is . . . . And yours?" Follow up with a question like "How do you know the host?" They'll be grateful for the rescue.
Can't find a loner? Then approach a few people casually conversing and say, “I hardly know anyone here. May I join you?” They’ll think you’re courageous and cool–and you’ll be astounded by their warm welcome.
Here come the company holiday bashes we all love to say we hate. Whether you’re pro or con, here are a few smooth survival moves.
1. Stand near the middle of the room. (Studies show that’s where VIPs instinctively gravitate.)
2. Hold your drink in your left hand. Nobody wants to shake a wet cold one.
3. If you take her business card, don’t just stuff it in your pocket or purse. Hold it at waist height and glance at it several times while chatting. This expresses curiosity and respect.
4. It is impressive to have a quality business card case. But insert only a few cards at a time in it so you don’t look like you’re dealing from a big deck.
5. When introducing someone, follow up with a sentence or two (preferably something intriguing) about one or both to get lively conversation going.
6. To escape a boring chat, say “It’s been great talking with you. I’ll let you mingle now so others will have a chance to meet you.”
A study conducted by sociolinguist Jennifer Daily O'Cane showed that saying "like" a lot (like some people do every other word!) establishes rapport between young people and makes them more likeable to each other. The downside is that when you say "like" too often, people figure you are less intelligent. You choose.
Whenever someone gives you good news (that you already knew), don’t tell her you already heard. Just thank her enthusiastically. Why not tell her?
Because good people enjoy giving good news.